Cities in South Florida Call for “More Over-Priced Tourist Restaurants” To Open

0
445

South Florida cities to offer a new version of their famous Southern hospitality standards in their unique Florida way to visitors, according to a new program.

Delray, Florida, April 1, 2024—In an unprecedented action, ten cities in South Florida have issued a joint request for national and individually owned restaurants to open, stipulating that they be “overpriced restaurants serving mediocre food that are specifically designated to attract tourists.”

In the joint press release issued on April 1, the cities signed a Request for Proposal (RFP) inviting restaurants to begin touring South Florida cities for possible locations to expedite the opening of these specially designated eateries.

The cities also said they would help subsidize this new effort and dedicate city resources, including zoning variances, funding, and tax rebates, so that the new restaurants could open quickly.

The cities that signed the RFP are Palm Beach, West Palm Beach, Boca Raton, Pompano Beach, Miami Beach,  Ft Lauderdale, Delray Beach, Deerfield Beach, Jupiter, and Aventura.  The cities also made the following stipulations in their RFP:

  • The restaurants should charge meal prices that are 50% to 60% over the cost of their food and utility costs;
  • The restaurants must offer paid valet parking. No free parking will be allowed.  Towing of the cars of restaurant patrons seeking free parking is encouraged;
  • All dishes will be a la carte. Sharing is not allowed. There will be no children’s prices. No high chairs should be provided.
  • If no tables are available, people waiting for a table should be served standing up.
  • No benches should be provided for people waiting in line.
  • Liquor and wine prices should be at least 75% more than the cost of a single bottle. For instance, if a bottle of wine costs $50, it must sell for a minimum of $85.
  • Reservations must be offered to patrons. If a person shows up at the restaurant without a reservation, the front desk attendant should say, “Of course, we require reservations, but we’ll make an exception for you.”;
  • People not from Florida using credit cards to pay for their meals must be charged a “Tourist Surcharge” of 20%;
  • The RFP calls for a minimum tip of 35% on all restaurant bills. This tip is mandatory and non-negotiable, regardless of the quality of the service or the food.  If the patron complains, the server should be instructed to say, “Too bad. You ordered it. You eat it.”;
  • Since the State of Florida approved this RFP, no one wearing an anti-COVID mask can be admitted to the restaurant under this RFP provision;
  • If a tourist objects to anything in this RFP, including prices, surcharges, parking rates, or mandatory tipping, the cities involved in this RFP will designate a Police Officer to detain the tourist and, if necessary, confine them in detention for ten days.

RFP Addresses the Shortage of Overpriced Tourist Restaurants

One of the mayors who signed the RFP but wanted to remain anonymous said the RFP” will be great for local businesses and bad for tourists, but that’s how we do things in Florida.  In many of our city assessments, we noticed too few outrageously priced tourist restaurants that serve below-average food, and we designed this RFP to rectify this deficiency.” 

Specifically, the RFP adds more outrageously priced restaurants that serve mediocre food close to popular tourist attractions, such as Mizner Square, Las Olas, South Beach, Boca Raton’s Restaurant Row, Clematis Street in West Palm Beach, and Palm Beach.

“We know there are over 41,000 restaurants in Florida, but the mayors believe there is a shortage of places that take advantage of tourists.  Doing more of this would boost the local economy and make America great again by serving unmemorable, non-nutritious, highly-priced meals to strangers we will never see again, according to our Governor DeSantis,” the mayor added, “This will make America Great Again, at least as we interpret this in Florida.”

The RFP will be made public on April 1, 2024.

Previous articleWhy Dystopian MAGA Trumpers Hate The Global World
Next articleThe Global Problem of Loneliness and Online Dating
Chuck Epstein has managed marketing communications and public relations departments for major global financial institutions and participated in the launch of industry-changing financial products. He also has written by-lined articles for over 50 publications, five books and served as editor and publisher of nation’s first newsletter on the topic of using the PC for personal investing and trading. (“Investing Online, 1994-1999). He also is a marketing consultant, writer and speaker on topics related to investor protection and opportunities in the very dynamic cannabis industry. He has held senior-level marketing, PR and communications positions at the New York Futures Exchange, Chicago Mercantile Exchange, Lind-Waldock, Zacks Investment Research, Russell Investments and Principal Financial. He has won national awards from the Mutual Fund Education Alliance (MFEA) and his web site, www.mutualfundreform.com, was named best small blog in 2009 by the Society of American Business Editors and Writers (SABEW).

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here